1. Buying green onions. I don't eat green onions. Nobody in our family eats green onions. Yet, I keep buying them on the off chance we're going to make something that requires green onions.
2. Taking the stubs of the green onions and putting them in water so that they will grow again, after they've gone all gross and mushy because we haven't used them. Then they grow and...become all gross and mushy.
3. Checking in on Foursquare. I don't know. What's the point of this? I don't have anyone on there to really compete with. It's pretty boring. And yet...I keep doing it.
4. Freezing chicken carcasses. My intention is to make chicken stock. I mean, I did that once. Now there are approximately 37 freezer-burnt chicken carcasses awaiting the next time I am possessed by Suzy Homemaker. I exorcised that bitch, this seems unlikely to come to pass. (See also: freezing old bananas.)
5. Charging and/or synching my iPod. I don't seem to use my iPod. I use my phone for tunes and my tablet for other stuff. I charge the iPod, leave it lying around, it dies, I charge it. It's the circle of life.
Everything else I do seems to produce some net gain for me (even the ones that don't feel like they do, like laundry and feeding the dog).
I guess that's not such a bad ratio.