The one (and only) where I try to sell you things. THINGS THAT MIGHT KEEP YOU HEALTHY. You’re welcome.

Anybody remember how a little while ago I mentioned I was considering becoming a rep for a company called OnlyGreen? No? It’s okay, I assume that I’m talking to myself most of the time.

But anyway, I went ahead and did just that, became an "Eco Advisor" for OnlyGreen. Anybody who knows me realizes that this kind of thing is, well, not really my thing. I mean, it involves sales. And talking passionately about stuff. Stuff that is not the Zombie Apocalypse.

(Seriously, you guys really need to start fortifying and stockpiling.)

But, I like the concept of OnlyGreen because there is a lot of scary information out there, about pthalates and parabens and PVCs and what they can do to us (and the planet, though personally I think that once we poison ourselves and all die from cancer that the planet will be fine). And I totally understand why a person would choose to NOT try to wade through that constantly-shifting information, and instead assume that the FDA knows what they're doing and Big Pharma truly does have our best interests in mind and lalalalalalalala I can't heeeeaaaaaaar you.

Because otherwise you end up whimpering and rocking in a corner, unable to bathe or eat or wear anything other than a burlap sack.

What was my point?

Oh, right. OnlyGreen just does all the research FOR you. All their products are subject to stringent criteria for eco-friendliness and sustainable harvesting and lack of the kind of chemicals that might grow you an extra liver or make your face fall off. It makes it easy to choose products that are truly "green", instead of just labelled that way. And as we all know...every little bit helps.

So that is all I'm going to say about THAT, because shilling wares is not what this blog is about (I don't know what it IS about, still, but it's not that)(Also, that's what TWITTER is for, mwahhahhahah). I'll put up a permanent link up top (once I figure out how to do that without breaking my blog) and then shut the fuck up. If there's enough interest, periodically I might hold an "Eco Workshop" where I give you little factoids about the amount of endocrine-altering chemicals your PVC dildo is offgassing, or how everytime you buy a Proctor & Gamble product they kill a kitten*, and then I might offer you some discounts. But if there's little to no interest, I'll happily go back to just being your RTT bitch.

*Totally facetious. I'm pretty sure P&G lets them grow up to be cats first.**

**Again, facetious. Please don't sue me.