If you scream in cyberspace, does anybody care?
Wednesday, September 9, 2009 at 8:20AM If somebody broke the internet, how long would it take us to find out what happened?
Think about it. I logged on to my work computer this morning, and launched my browser, only to get a Site Not Found message. Google: Site Not Found. Hotmail: Site Not Found. Facebook: Site Not Found.
Hm. Okay. No big panic.
(Well maybe a small panic)
The network is probably down. I'll just check the wireless connection. I mean, I'm sure it's just MY computer, although it could be the whole office. Or the whole block, maybe someone cut a cable. Or - IT COULD BE THE WHOLE INTERNET. OH HOLY CRAP, SOME SADISTIC BASTARD BROKE THE INTERNET.
Because those are the kinds of conclusions I jump to before I've had any coffee.
(And yes, I'm blogging from work. I'm on a coffee break. SHUT UP, this is important.)
Anyway, obviously I got my internet back. But not before I thought about how I get the entirety of my information - the internet, of course. Stuff I see on the news and hear on the radio I've usually already read on the internet, at least two days earlier. If someone broke the internet, it could be MONTHS before the news got here via carrier pigeon. And then - gasp! - someone might have to tell me face to face.
How unreliable is THAT?
Anyway, I'm very sorry if I've scared you. I've had my coffee now, I'm all better. Back to you regularly scheduled programming.
(*shudder*)
Reader Comments (26)
There is no 12 step program that can help me if the internet was broken.
i also have major issues with "conclusion jumping" before i can allow reasonable thought to triumph.
that almost sounded smart, but maybe that's just me;)
andy
i don't know what i would do all day without the internet. play with my kids? bawhahahaha!
In China they have internet addiction camps, just like fat camps here.
I don't want to do the face to face thing, thank you. I prefer to read fifteen different sources of info and come to my own exclusive conclusion.
If the internet died, how would we get internet coupons?
don't even joke like that!!! if the internet were down, I would die!!!! yes, I would - I would be forced to socialize with people in person and forced to be funny in person too which by what my husband tells me, I am not too good at, just in writing.
I'm definitely with you. Lack of coffee in the morning causes crazy, irrational thoughts !
Ok, wait. I know I'm not technical or anything, but is it possible for one person to break the whole internet? And if so, who is that fucker because we need to find him and lock him up right now.
I'd fall on my sword before I'd go on living without the internet.
(And by sword I mean like a pile of dunkin donuts or something.)
I can't imagine to absolute freakin' devastation if the internet ceased to exist. Truly I can't.
I think no internet would be a nice break. I could officially not give a shit then.
Blasphemy!! All joking aside I am completely addicted at work (its how I do my work) and for an hour or so at home sometimes. But I can go away on vacation and not check in for the time I am away - ok if there happens to be a free computer with internet connection in my condo or whatever I look - I admit it!!
This is no joking matter!
BTW, your HASAY post appears to be missing...
;-)
The horror of it! I just can't imagine!
SO.
How did the clown experiment go?
I, for one, am glad the Internet got fixed.
YIKES! A broken internet? Unimaginable!!
How on earth would we blog?? And how would I survive without reading your posts???
Oh dear....
No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no.
Sorry, I'm living in denial that the interewebz could ever be broken or go away.
No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no.
The internet can't EVER go away. It allows me to be social without EVER having to actually see anyone. I love that...
If the internet went down my job would cease to exist. Somehow, when I say it like that it doesn't sound like a bad thing. With the exception of blogging.
This post isn't funny. Not funny at all. YOU TAKE IT BACK RIGHT NOW!!!
Mine went down for a few hours once and I was ready to trade my kids for five minutes online.
Psst!
...it was the zombies...
Sshhh!!
OMG! from the beginning, my very first thought was "what would I do? I work online, most of my friends are olf, not irl (I am a wahm), I do all of my banking online, all of my pictures are online!!!!AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH I will never sleep tonight. Let's make a movie!
I realized today how much I NEED the internet. No free wifi at the Dallas airport. I don't feel the need to pay for it either. Why can't it just be free everywhere? It makes the world go 'round at this point. Whatever!
That's just not even funny. I don't want to think about it. If there was no internet, I'd have to carve my blog post into a carrier pigeon and send him all over the world for everyone to read and could you imagine that poor thing when I had to comment back? I'd have a retarded bird.
This sounds so much like me yesterday when I was recovering from a sinus infection. I drove past a sign for a driving range advertising heated tees. I spent the next 30 minutes wondering why they only heat the tees and not the whole building.
Wow, it never occurred to me that the Internet might break. Now I'm going to have nightmares.