You'd think someone would have noticed I was a Pod Person

I have these metal kabob skewer things in my kitchen that I have never ONCE used for kabobs, but they're kind of my 'go-to' utensil for pretty much everything. Need to test a cake? Use a metal kabob skewer. Need to poke a crayon out of an oddly tube-shaped toy where your toddler lodged it? Metal skewer. Need to stab someone in the eye because there's been a broken microwave sitting in your kitchen for 5 months? Hey! I have these metal skewers!

Okay, partially kidding about that last one. Honey. Really, I was kidding.

But they are handy-dandy. Earlier I dropped a bottle lid down the drain in the bathroom sink. You know how sometimes they're the EXACT size of the drain? So they don't fall down but they won't come up easily either? I tried to get it out with tweezers, but just ended up shoving it out of tweezer reach, and then I had a go with the end of a makeup brush, but couldn't hook it. And nothing else was really thin enough, so I thought, oh! Hey! Metal kabob skewers!

So I'm attempting to pick up a plastic lid with two kabob skewers, and I'm wondering if I can sell the sludge that's on the walls of my drain to NASA as a possible alien life form, and I start composing this blog post in my head. And then I realize that I'm planning on blogging about getting a plastic cap out of my drain. So I immediately looked around for something sharp to cut my wrists with, because, hello? I MAY AS WELL JUST DIE NOW.

Also, up there? I used the word 'handy-dandy' in a sentence.

Seriously, interwebs, I used to be much cooler than this.

Well, okay, I was never cool. But COME ON!