Some thoughts on a fashion show

A local boutique clothing store, coincidentally the one that my friend Fashionista runs, held a fashion show recently to benefit summer school programs for autistic children. I'd never been to a fashion show, and it was a good cause, and oooh! fabulous clothes! ...so I went. Aren't you wondering what I thought?

Well, too bad and shut up.

1. It doesn't matter how dressed up you are, at a fashion show you're underdressed. I should have just cut my losses and worn sweatpants. I could have eaten more of those little cupcakes they're serving.

2. OMG, I love that bag.

3. OMG, that bag is SEVEN HUNDRED DOLLARS.

4. OMG! They're raffling it off! Buy buy buy!

5. Yeah, serving wine was probably a sound business decision here.

6. Okay, I know that I actually KNOW those people in real life, but they're skinny and beautiful and wearing fabulous clothes so I HATE THEM.

7. If that shirt weren't being worn by someone tall and blonde and gorgeous (WHO I HATE), she would look like Mrs. Roper.

8. Why does men's fashion usually consist mostly of things actual men won't wear?

9. Oh, right. That's the case with women too.

10. Sitting here heckling the models with a group of friends is so high school. I LOVE IT.

11. Okay, I want that.

12. That too.

13. That is HOW MUCH? BwahhahhahhahHAHHAHAH!!! Okay, never mind. I could make several mortgage payments instead.

14. Oooh, more cupcakes!

15. Okay, I didn't win the bag. I can go home now.

16. After one more cupcake. Nom.