And...here we go!
1. Donating that kidney was my last random act of kindness. What? No, it wasn't MINE. But wasn't that nice of me anyway?
2. Another place might charge you twice what I'm asking for a skin graft. Like, TWO donkeys and a bushel of bananas.
3. I'm strictly an amateur, in matters of the heart. I mean, I can't even perform a triple bypass. Double, MAYBE.
4. Coffee, tea or doctor-recommended Red Bull?
5. I think these nerves were supposed to be on separate paths. Oops. Um, try scratching your nose for me wouldja?
6. Our nurse reminds me that there is the matter of your bill to settle before I put this lung back.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to rehearsing my speech to the jury, tomorrow my plans include defending myself during a malpractice suit and Sunday, I want to try to get my license back!
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