Pixels are out to get me

Okay, so I'm not very good at this whole starvation dieting thing. I'm still using Weight Watchers as a guide, but I keep falling off the wagon. You should see the bruises on my ass.

But the bacon diet must be working for me, because this week I lost another pound. It's slow, but I'm getting there, I swear.

I have to give SOME credit to my new personal trainer. Her name is Maya, and she lives in my TV.

Dontcha hate her?

I don't know what she does when I don't have the Wii turned on. My guess is she works out and thinks up evil plans for world domination through aerobics routines with an excessive amount of lunges and squats.

You know, like REAL personal trainers do.

I kind of liked her in the beginning, because her workouts seemed pretty easy, and when hubby saw how easy they were he figured he'd build his own profile. He found them kind of difficult, which made me feel just the teensiest bit smug.

Until Maya ramped it up, and handed me my ass on a platter in 30 minutes flat.

Bitch.

Anyway, I guess I'll keep meeting with her, because the price is right and I can feel like I actually DID something on those days I can't get to the gym. Plus, I have a bit of OCD when it comes to video games and now I'm going to unlock every last one of those workout locations and lame-ass musical selections if it fucking kills me.

Which it might. At the end of last session, Maya cheerily announced that the next workout would be my "fitness evaluation".

Wait, what? Nobody told me there was going to be a TEST.