It's that time again....I wonder how many of these things I've done? And if you added up all the random thoughts, would you get a story?
Feelin' scatterbrained and random? Need to take a mental piss before you can write properly? Grab the button, write an incohesive post, and ta-da! We can take that "does not play well with others" status off of your report card.
So, let's go!
I've recently decided that Weight Watchers can suck it when it comes to my wine during blogging. I'm just not as clever without it. It keeps up my spirits. Really, wine is essential to my success as a blogger.
Why yes, I can rationalize anything, why do you ask?
So I posted yesterday about my one over-developed ab (My keg, if you will, yes, thank you for that visual, Beth, remind me to repay you somehow) and how it's making life on that side of my body uncomfortable, but I didn't mention the various other self-diagnoses I ran through before arriving at that conclusion. Like, oh I don't know, a potentially enlarged liver. (See above). Or a lump on my lung or possibly some kind of pancreas injury.
That last one I kind of had mixed feelings about, because
Yes, I have always been this demented, why do you ask?
Is it just me, or does "unoaked" shiraz taste like, well, someone shoved a bunch of grapes into an aluminum can to rot?
Hubby is off work all week because he needed a vacation. I could totally get into this "house husband" thing. So far he's
gotten up with the toddler so I could sleep in
...napped on the couch and fed the toddler ice cream.
Wait. WHY does anybody have a house husband, again?
Apparently now it can't be a Tuesday, or even a day ending in -day, without me mentioning zombies, because people keep sending me links like this.
Which? Totally practical for when the time comes and all, but, maybe not so much with a toddler around.
Also, I don't know if I've mentioned this or not, but ZOMBIES FREAK ME THE FUCK OUT. Stop making me think about them!
Despite all my talking about zombies here, exactly ONE google search containing the word 'zombie' has lured someone in. Yet there are all these sites and links about zombies that people are perfectly happy to send me. Which makes me conclude with scientific certainty that all zombie sites and campaigns are popularized VIRALLY.
Wait. Zombies...viral. Viral zombies. Zombies could be spread by a virus.
Crap. They don't even have to EXIST, and they're going to take over the internet.
Is there some kind of additional ingredient to "unoaked" shiraz that I'm not informed on?
This photo of my son in the bath is residing happily on Photobucket, but a photo of his naked butt got deleted. They must have an automatic "butt recognition" program or something? Who designs such software, and how is their job satisfaction? Or is it just one guy going through all the uploaded pics looking for ass crack?
Because I might need a new job. I suck at programming, but I'm good with butts.
So someone better start paying me to blog before I am sucked into the seedy world of photobucket porn. Til then, keep it random...grab the button, blather away (with or without wine, it's not mandatory, though I recommend it), and leave your link with Mr. Linky. Try to visit a few of the other participants, because everybody on this list RAWKS!
Happy Tuesday, ya'll!
67 people talked back :
Urban Bone Machete Mark II - because one wasn't enough? I had no idea so many zombie weapons existed outside of video games.
The bath picture is cutest thing I've seen in awhile. I have no idea how you manage 3 blogs - I can barely do one.
Recent blog post: Let the Randomness Flow
I usually wander in late to the party. I guess all that sleep I am missing is good for something. I have the same kind of husband that you have. Really not cut out to be a stay at home dad. If I weren't here, I think my kids would live on pasta and cake.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
It's hit or miss when my husband's home. Sometimes he'll be like super honey do husband and get a bunch of stuff done and then there are other times when he pretty much goes from bed to recliner, to another recliner, (because doesn't everyone need two?) to bed.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
It's barely 7:00 in the morning and I just don't have anything witty to say (need my diet coke first) so I'll just say hey I was here :)
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday...Same Old Same Old
If you don't want all the links of zombies, send them to me. I think zombies are neat. Unless they are zombie clowns and then, that is just scary.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts: Stupid Day Light Saving Time!
I think Weight Watchers can suck it in general. ;) Vodka tonics are a nice writing aid too. It would be funny to have someone go through my posts and determine which were written in the morning, and which were written in the evening. And no, there's no vodka in my OJ...at least not yet.
Recent blog post: International Women’s Day 2009
I am so going to try the Wine as a writing aid...
I just need to know what has the highest alcohol content..lol..
don't judge me.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Zombies scare me too...alot. : )
I posted Random today! (Well everyday but today more than usual)
Just say no to CRACK?? ROFL!
Just being a little "linky slut"...I'll be back to read...gotta get the kiddos out the door! :)
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Photobucket butt porn.. I wonder who will land here from those crazy Google searches. Viral zombies is funny, and it's funny your loyal following keeps perpetuating your fear. Do zombie banks count?
Recent blog post: Tuesday's Random Thoughts
I too like the sauce when I write... But it has been pointed out that
i also need, i mean like it at many other times... lol
Recent blog post: Mommy the traitor
I have the overdeveloped lumpy ab too and it's made me think I'm dying on more than one occasion. There is a smaller lump on the opposite side from the smaller kid. How weird is that? I have a semi-house husband (he works from home a lot) and although it has its advantages, like him cooking and cleaning, it also has its disadvantages, like him scowling at me for blogging too much. Happy Tuesday!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts: Back Off Ladies, He’s Taken
I can see your comments! I was beginning to think the zombies controlled those too, cuz I had some real comment gems...
ANYTHING "unoaked" will taste like it's been rotting in an aluminum can. Don't ask how I know this. It's not pretty..
Recent blog post: It's Tuesday, It's Random, You Should Expect It Now
I am bummed that I didn't participate this week. I totally forgot. Maybe I will post twice today.
But I would definitely need wine for that. "Oaked" Shiraz preferably.
Recent blog post: The Straight Poop from The Wise Young Munchkins
My husband has taken vacations at home just like that...I want to know, when is it MY turn to sleep in?
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts: Photo Time
Maybe you should have had some oaked Shiraz before moving onto the the unoaked bottle...then maybe you'd already be buzzed and not notice the fermented in a tin can taste... ;) I'm going to have to start writing my posts at night with wine instead of in the morning with coffee...I think hubby would really start to wonder about me if I were drinking wine in the morning to spice up my posts...(snicker!)
My hubby would definitely not make a good 'house husband' either...sure there are times when he's all gung-ho and motivated to get things done, but usually at the expense of me getting my stuff done...you know, like blogging...other times he just gets underfoot - which also interrupts blogging time... ;)
Viral Zombies I can do without... Adorable pics I can't live without... ;)
Great Randomness! :) Happy Tuesday!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts - DST News and Horses
SUCH a cutie patootie in the tub! Definitley get that sucker blown up, black & white and framed for the bathroom wall!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
I do everything better with a couple of glasses of wine or at least I think I do. Unoaked anything is nasty.
I promise not to send you any zombie shit.
House husbands....not real productive.
Recent blog post: Flavor Infuse Vodka - or a love affair begins
Maybe photobucket is down. I use flicker and sometimes my photos won't show up on my blog because the site is down. Maybe your husband just wanted to participate in "National Napping Day." I read that yesterday was National Napping Day!
Bwaaahhhaahahaha! I totally forgot about the pancreas bet! Ummm, but wasn't it spleen? I thought it was spleen.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Weight Watchers can just suck it.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Ok, why is it that by the time I get over here to read this... half the world has already been here? Damn, Keely.. and it's not even 7am here...you got it going on girl. (I know, I'm on the wrong coast for more reasons than that..)
Now.. I asked my better all-wine-knowing half and he says:
"This is a wine I like with a significant Syrah component that sees no oak:
http://winelibrary.com/reviewwine.asp?item=37776
fermented in cement!"
That's my contribution to your wine habit for today... no you can't borrow him....
: )
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thought or no, I'm still not telling you what I was doing all weekend
Okay, I'll come clean. That's totally MY job. Butt-crack photo remover. Sigh. You got me, okay?
Recent blog post: Musical Monday: My Favorite Cover Edition
I loved it when my hubby was a SAHD. He did all the things I hated - laundry, dishes, etc. He's more of a clean freak than I am. He just didn't like it when the kids dragged their toys out to play with them, he would say, "I just cleaned this room!"
Recent blog post: Do Nothing!
My husband is similarly non-productive when he's home, and he slows me down, and he glares disapprovingly when I'm attached to my laptop. No, but yeah, it's great...having...him home or whatever. I loved the Zombie Che shirt. Pretty cool.
Recent blog post: Happy Birthday to Me
How do you get the butt-crack remover job in Photobucket? I want it!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Sorry to link again, I did it wrong the first time. Ugh!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
My husband just asked me to schedule a Directv appointment during the week and he would stay home because "he could use a day around the house." I left the room before he could see me snicker at his statement. A day around the house would mean sleeping in, maybe wash the car, watch NASCAR and take a nap.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday - March 10, 2009
I'm interested in this 'House Husband' gig. I just fed my toddler ice cream yesterday. I believe I have all the requirements covered.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Great random thoughts, as usual. I'd pick up the Zombie machete, but I think my two teenage girls might use it on each other before I have the chance to use it in any upcoming Zombie Apocalypse!
Recent blog post: Random Thoughts
My internet keeps needing to be rebooted....damn computer....oh, wine...mmmmm. Sometimes you gotta buy the good stuff...then open the bottle of the crappy stuff. Then the crappy stuff doesn't taste so bad. :)
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts…..my reading skills suck!!!
So, what you're saying is that seeing as Mark is taking a vacation next month, and I've got a list of things I want done around the house, just to scratch everything off the list and write "lay on the couch and watch Judge Judy"? Yeah, I already did that. After his last vacation.
Recent blog post: I'll Bet Bob Vila Doesn't Say "Stick A Chair In Front Of It- No One Will Ever Notice"
If you want a new ad network that pays way better, contact Glam Media, they kick arse and pay pretty well.
Uh oh. I just wrote a post and mentioned YOU, Keely and um...um...ZOMBIES!
hee hee?
You did all of us a public service when you clued us into the zombie problem that has largely gone ignored until now! Keely the Zombie Slayer!
lol
It is a ton more work when my other 1/2 is home with me during the week.
Interesting that they picke dup on the baby ass crack photo.
Recent blog post: Monkeys and Insects {Random Tuesday}
unoaked shiraz is what zombies drink. so if you are drinking it... i'm sorry to tell you, you will probably turn into a zombie. the good news is that it is gradual so you won't notice what is happening. or its just wine aged in barrels made of something other than oak. i'm not sure. i've heard both.
Just fyi, I totally wrote my post before I even read yours. Creepy.
And my short story about zombies? It was about the government turning people into zombies with a virus and then controlling us.. No lie. I actually dreamed that.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts: I am a Russian Spy Named Sylvia.
Happy Tuesday. I do hope that you were told about the missing hinny?
Recent blog post: Time to Play Well With Others This Week : Random Tuesday
I'm just not that "random" a person, but here's tryin... Check it out...
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday
Random Thought Tuesday does ROCK!
That photo of X is stinkin' adorable! My husband is using the Zombie playground print from last week as his desktop-he says, "Thanks!" Best of luck with your new butt-recognition career! If you need a reference, I'm here for ya-lol!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts: PBS is trying to tell me something...
Hmm.. I wonder how much my son would want to kill me if I posted pics of him in the tub? (He's 14).
I feel lucky, I'm not afraid of zombies. Spiders crawling up my hoo-haa while I'm asleep, yes, zombies, no.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Excellent randomness, and now 'mental piss' is engraved into my head.
Recent blog post: I'm Not Above Shameless Plugs
this blog is a find!
Wait until your kids are grown like mine and get embarrassed at all the things you write about...it's a kick!
Recent blog post: 50 Days in Office:I am Scared and Angry
i linked up - but my random was yesterday - that cool?
Damn, who knew being random was such hard work. If I wanted to actually think about a blog post, I would have finished one of the 9 drafts I have floating around in WordPress!
Recent blog post: Tom Cruise and adult diapers. Yep, Random Tuesday Thoughts
"Take a mental piss..." Best line I've read all day! Awesome! If I take lots and lots of mental pisses, will I lose weight?
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
If you kept writing about Zombies,I will need to up my xanax before I read your blog!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Ass crack monitor . . . your future begins now!
Recent blog post: Review: Every Sunrise
I work for Photobucket and I can confirm that yes, we have an automatic "butt recognition" program. We call it the ACA, or Ass Cheek Alert.
I'm kidding, obviously. But the zombies aren't...mwaahahaha.
Recent blog post: I thought I handled the butt segway quite nicely, though this post is a total pity party
HILARIOUS!!! thanks for the laugh as always!!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts - where's my sanity?
Dude, you have fifty people spewing randomness today. You rock!
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts: Back Off Ladies, He’s Taken
You are awesome wealth of zombie knowledge. Because of you I am so prepared for a zombie invasion. :)
Recent blog post: The seed has sprung
This Blog is the Bomb! Is it still cool to say that?
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
Zombies. Yikes. Thanks for the awesome dream material. And thanks for stopping by today.
Recent blog post: Random Tuesday Thoughts
I reeeeally don't like zombies either. I take it you've seen the re-make of Dawn of the Dead? Or maybe you haven't. If not, I recommend keeping things that way. It was horrific.
Recent blog post: It's Tuesday, it's my 150th post, what can be more exciting than that? Wait, I can think of something...
You just made my Tuesday happier...ass crack monitor. Love it.
Recent blog post: Babble
Should the zombies ever take you they should hire you for PR!
Recent blog post: It's that time again!
but too much wine is bad for you.
Recent blog post: The TV that blogging bought
Not only do I not know why anybody has a house husband, I don't even know why anyone has a husband period. :p
Recent blog post: Keeping the Faith
Not only do I not know why anyone has a househusband, I don't even know why anyone has a husband period. :p
Recent blog post: Keeping the Faith
oooh, bad house husband! but snaps for feeding the toddler ice cream. bet he's loving that.
Recent blog post: The F-Word
YOU, my dear, are a HOOT! So glad i found your Blog ~ Hilarious & LOL and all that!
Recent blog post: Did you know? ~ MARCH is Women's History Month!
This is such a good idea! I'll be back to participate in this Meme on Tuesdays! Thanks!
Recent blog post: Go Green Everyday Not Just on Saint Patrick's Day: Make Your Own Cleaning Products
hehehe I enjoy blogging, but I LOVE me a glass of wine...I NEVER thought to actually do both TOGETHER.. hmmm I may be a better blogger with less stress on the brain.. lol.. BTW.. Photobucket cannot have an auto but recognition program, it may confuse butt crack with butt head, crack head, etc... and delete perfectly useless photos... hehehehe Hapy Tuesday..
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