Because Hallowe'en is coming up, and it's my absolutely favoritest (that IS SO a word) holiday-that-you-don't-actually-get-off-work of the year, I thought I should tell you people again what afears me the most. 44%
No, it's not spiders, even though they have WAY too many legs going in way too many directions at once, they're a crime against nature, and one kamikaze-leapt off the shower curtain this morning onto my naked self, and made me scream like a little girl and flail until it had washed down the drain, and I slipped and narrowly missed chipping a tooth. I have been wary of spiders ever since one bit me in my teenage basement cave and ended our peaceable co-existence, but they don't scare me, exactly.
It's zombies. I have halfway convinced myself that I will actually see a Zombie Apocalypse in my lifetime, I literally have nightmares about it. And zombie MOVIES? I've seen every last terrifying one, totally against my better judgement.
(Once, when I was a teenager and working at one of those all-you-can-eat salad bar joints that attract the cheap, the obese, and the unfortunate, I glanced up from my till at 5 o'clock to see about 20 people lurching slowly toward the building from the parking lot, and it looked exactly like the view from the Night of the Living Dead house. I had to restrain myself from leaping up to nail boards across the door, which would have been pretty silly since the door opened outward, and the zombies customers would have been all, Oh hey, there's some boards here, and then stepped under them. And then I looked over and well, duh, we were featuring brains on our salad bar that day, no WONDER we were plagued with zombies. Or it may have been that weird salad with little colored marshmallows in it. Either way.)
So now you know my greatest fear. I bet Batman has a zombie in his batcave now, in case one day I go mad with power, and try to destroy the world. Then he can just whip out his zombie and subdue me. (Well, that sounded a little wrong, but you get the idea.)(What do you mean he's just a character in a comic? LALALALA I'm not listening!!)
Also, things like this? NOT REASSURING:
I gotta go stock up on guns, 2x4s, and canned goods, not necessarily in that order.
9 people talked back :
that's ok. i'm afraid of the dark. people say "why b/c you think someone is there?" and i say "no, something". i'm not afraid of people, i'm afraid monsters lurking in the dark! i'm such a loser!!!
Wow, zombies? I'm not afraid of them but I suppose if a bunch came staggering toward me I might be.
My favorite holiday is also Halloween! But you know what I am afraid of? The movie "Halloween" I am watching it right now on AMC, well not really.. I am trying not to pay attention to it.. but the music... OMG the music! Its torture for me! WTF am I doing to myself?
Very nice. My husband is a self-proclaimed zombie expert (dear god what did I get myself into??) so you are welcome to tap him for knowledge on zombie survival. He actually thinks its funny when we watch a romero movie and then I spend the night sleeping buried UNDERNEATH him because I have nightmares.
I am only afraid of one thing (person)....Private Eye. She is too smart and crafty for me. If I make her mad, which I often do, I have to sleep with one eye open. She will hit me in the face with a hot skillet and swear she was sleep walking or has no recollection of the fore mentioned activity. I am about 6 foot 3 at 270lbs and she is a miniature 5 foot 3 at about 110lbs. So I cannot even call the cops for spousal abuse without looking like a major wimp. She has got me by the short hairs!
I know how you feel. I have that "oh shizzz I'm getting chased by zombies who were once my family and friends and now I have to carry my kid, 2 rabbits that I just found and need to save AND a tv (why? I have no idea) on my back while riding a bike" dream like 2x a year. I always wake up scared out of my mind, shivering under the covers... but I LOVE apocalypse type movies almost as much as I love steamy historical romance novels.
I just wanted to let you know you have been tagged on my site: Dad to Two
dadtotwo.com
Zombies? I never thought to be afraid of them. I now consider myself forewarned. :-)
so, don't you like have spidy powers since you were bitten by a spider? LOL! :) Me, I'm afraid of what's in the dark as well, and i hate dolls that have eyelids that open and close, it's just too freaky especially at night... Zombies I can totally handle, I'm gonna bust a move like Jill Valentine in Resident Evil... LOL! :) btw, have you seen Shaun of the Dead, it's a funny zombie movie, check it out if you haven't already... :) love your blog! :)
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